Humorous - Cross Stitch Patterns & Kits


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Ho Ho No - Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock and Fig
"Ho Ho No! Model stitched on 14 Ct. Antique White Aida with DMC floss. Stitch Count: 40W x 51H

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Fa La La Wine - Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock and Fig
"Fa la la la la la la la Wine! Model stitched on 14 Ct. Antique White Aida with DMC floss. Stitch Count: 40W x 55H

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Go Pollinate Yourself - Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock and Fig
Model stitched on 28 Ct. Antique White Cashel linen with DMC floss and Kreinik #4 Braid. Stitch Count: 100x90.

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Rose Colored Glasses - Cross Stitch Kit by Dimensions
When the going gets tough, put on your Rose Colored Glasses! The cute bunny on this counted cross stitch design by Dimensions knows that those glasses can make the world seem like a better place. Finished size: 5" x 7". This cross stitch kit contains presorted thread, 14 count white Aida, needle, and instructions.

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Singing Cow - Cross Stitch Kit by Permin
The complete kit includes 14 Ct. White Aida, pattern, thread, needle, instructions and green Flexi-Hoop. Finished size: 8" x 10.4"

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The Struggle is Real - Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock and Fig
"Believe in your inner unicorn." Model stitched on 14 Ct. White aida with DMC floss and Kreinik #4 Braid. Stitch Count: 100W x 100H.

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Where the Heart Is - Beaded Cross Stitch Kit by Mill Hill
"Home is where the heart is, even if you can't remember which box you packed it in. Happy new home." Complete kit includes 28 Ct. linen beads, floss, needle, chart and instructions. Finished size 7" x 7". Curly Girl Design.

(1 review)
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Can't Adult - Humorous Cross Stitch Kit by Dimensions
Features the humorous sentiment "I Can't Adult Today". This cross stitch kit contains 14-count white Aida, thread, one needle, one 6 inch plastic hoop and easy to follow instructions. Finished size: 6 inches round.

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Do Not Read - Cross Stitch Kit by Permin
"Do not read the next sentence. You little rebel, I like you!" Kit includes 14 Ct. White Aida, pattern, thread, needle, wooden hoop and instructions. Finished size: 8".

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I'm Not Old, I'm 25 plus S&H - Cross Stitch Pattern by MarNic Designs
I"m not old, I'm $25 S&H" Model stitched over two on 28 Ct. Antique White Jobelan using DMC, Caron Waterlilies and Gentle Arts threads. Stitch Count: 86W x 57H

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I'm Sorry - Cross Stitch Kit by Permin
"I'm sorry for what I said when I was hungry - in need of coffee - tired." Kit includes 14 Ct. White Aida, pattern, thread, needle, wooden hoop and instructions. Finished size: 8".

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Normal Family - Cross Stitch Pattern by My Big Toe Designs
"Remember, as far as anyone knows we are a nice normal family". Model stitched on 32 count Antique White Jobelan with Crescent Colours thread. Stitch count is 134W x 86H.

(1 review)
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Reading Cow - Cross Stitch Kit by Permin
The complete kit includes 14 Ct. White Aida, pattern, thread, needle, instructions and green Flexi-Hoop. Finished size: 8" x 10.4"

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Work - Cross Stitch Kit by Design Works
Featuring the humorous office sentiment "Work fascinates me... I can sit and look at it for hours". This Counted Cross Stitch kit comes complete with: 14 Count Aida Fabric, 100% Cotton Embroidery Floss, #24 Tapestry Needle, and Fully Illustrated Instructions. 5" x 7".

(1 review)
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A Very Faint Line - Cross Stitch Pattern by My Big Toe Designs
"The line is very faint between hobby and mental illness." Model stitched on 28 Ct. Ivory Jobelan with Weeks Dye Works floss and Just Another Button Company buttons (4483S, 1171S, 3361, 3369M, 3387). Stitch Count: 48W x 83H.

(2 reviews)
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Be the Flamingo - Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock and Fig
"Be the flamingo in the flock of pigeons." Model stitched on 14 Ct. White aida with DMC floss and Kreinik #4 Braid. Stitch Count: 100x160.

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Birthday Party (Laura's Thimbles) - Cross Stitch Pattern by AuryTm
Model is stitched on 28 count Stormy Gray Cashel using Crescent Colours threads. Stitch count: 121W x 24H.

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Bow Before Me - Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock and Fig
"It's my birthday. Bow before me, peasants!" Model stitched over 2 threads on 25 Ct. Moss Celadon Lugana with DMC floss, Kreinik #4 Braid, and Mill Hill Beads. Stitch Count: 100W x 120H.

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Cape And Tiara - Beaded Cross Stitch Kit by Mill Hill
"I am fairly certain that given a cape and a nice tiara, I could save the world." Complete kit includes 28 ct orange linen, beads, floss, needle, chart and instructions. Finished size 7" x 7". Curly Girl Design.

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Country Wise - Cross Stitch Pattern by Prairie Schooler
Models stitched over two threads on 32 count linen using DMC thread. Stitch count: "Plan Ahead" - 157W x 38H; "Keep it Simple" - 160W x 38H; "Measure Twice" - 113W x 70H; "The Witch is In" - 59W x 41H. Book #130

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Early to Bed - Cross Stitch Pattern by My Big Toe Designs
"Early to bed, early to rise. Who are we kidding?" Model stitched on 32 Ct. Antique White Jobelan with Weeks Dye Works floss and shown with buttons from Just Another Button Company. Stitch Count: 53W x 85H.

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Frog Parking - Cross Stitch Kit by Dimensions
This cross stitch kit features frogs and the humorous sentiment "Frog parking only - all others will be toad". This kit contains 14-count blue Aida fabric, pre-sorted six-strand 100% cotton floss, needle, graph and instructions. Design: Frog Parking: 7"x5".

(1 review)
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I Solemnly Sweart I Am Up to No Good - Cross Stitch Pattern by MarNic Designs
"I solemnly swear I am up to no good." Model stitched over 2 threads on 28 Ct. Antique White Cashel linen with DMC floss, Gentle Art Sampler threads, Mill Hill beads and Rainbow Gallery Petite Treasure Braid. Stitch Count: 111W x 97H

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Inner Unicorn - Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock and Fig
"Believe in your inner unicorn." Model stitched on 14 Ct. White aida with DMC floss and DMC Light Effects. Stitch Count: 100W x 140H.

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Morning Person- Aunty Acid- Cross Stitch Kit by Janlynn
Features the humorous sentiment "I could definitely be a morning person if morning started at noon". This cross stitch kit contains 14-count white Aida, cotton floss, floss card, needle, graph and instructions (mat and frame are not included).

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Queen Bee - Cross Stitch Pattern by Peacock and Fig
"All Hail the Queen." Model stitched on 14 Ct. White aida with DMC floss and Kreinik #4 Braid. Stitch Count: 120W x 120H

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Retirement - Cross Stitch Pattern by Designs By Lisa
"Retirement - Feel the Joy!" was stitched on 28 Ct. Sky Blue Linen with Gentle Art Sampler threads. Stitch Count: 63W x 72H.
"Can't Make Me, I'm Retired" was stitched on 28 Ct. Lambswool linen with Gentle Art Sampler Threads. Count:85x65.
(DMC alternates are 3045 977 445 3363 792 791 3802 3371 310)

(3 reviews)
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Taste Your Words- Aunty Acid- Cross Stitch Kit by Janlynn
Features the humorous sentiment "Remember: be sure to taste your words before you spit them out". This cross stitch kit contains 14-count white Aida, cotton floss, floss card, needle, graph and instructions (mat and frame are not included).

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Troubled Water - Cross Stitch Pattern by Ink Circles
The first in a "Bad Neighborhoods" series - featuring dead fish floating in the water! Model stitched on 30 Ct. Beige linen with Gentle Art Sampler threads (or DMC 3013, 3328, 3854, 3835, 3773, 746, 801, 3363, 932, 612). Stitch Count: 71x81.

(2 reviews)
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Wake Up - Cross Stitch Kit by Permin
"Wake Up, Kiss Ass, Repeat." Kit includes 14 Ct. White Aida, pattern, thread, needle, wooden hoop and instructions. Finished size: 8".

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Warped Humor - Cross Stitch Pattern by My Big Toe Designs
"I have a warped sense of humor and I'm not afraid to use it." Model stitched over 2 threads on 32 Ct. Antique White Jobelan with Weeks Dye Works floss. Stitch Count: 95W x 63H.

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