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Funny Cross Stitch Patterns

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96 items found

18-1937 Loads Of Fun (Laundry Company 2) - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Hands On Design
$9.00 $8.09
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(2nd in the series) Model stitched over two threads on 32 Ct. White Belfast linen using DMC floss. (includes bonus pattern) Stitch count for Loads of fun: 63x91. Design Size: 4" x 6" Stitch count for Bonus Chart: 200x22. Design Size: 13" x 2" Collect all 3 charts in The Laundry Company mini-series to complete the bonus chart (if stitching entire series only 1 skein of each floss is needed with exception of 3849) FABRIC LISTED FOR ONLY THE SMALL PATTERN
HD-237 Turnip the Beet - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Hands On Design
$10.00 $8.99
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"Lettuce turnip the beet peas" Model stitched on either 32 Ct. White Belfast or 32 Ct. Chalkboard Black (DMC 08 not used on Chalkboard Black) using DMC floss. Stitch Count 80x80. Design Size: 5" x 5".
19-2036 Choose Your Own Motto Sampler - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Heartstring Samplery
$12.00 $10.79
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"All I'm saying is that you've never seen me crying and eating tacos at the same time." Model stitched one over two on 40 Ct. Cocoa using Weeks Dye Works, Gentle Art Sampler Threads, and Classic Colorworks (or all DMC floss 924, 436, 356, 221, 3364, 680, 3818, Ecru, 939, 3064, 3834, 730, 3778, 3829, 3768, 935). Stitch Count: 205W x 171H. Design Size: 11" x 9"
PS164 Drive a Stick - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Sue Hillis
$6.00 $5.39
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"Yes, I can drive a stick." Model stitched on 30 Ct. Lilac linen by Weeks Dye Works with Sullivan's floss. Stitch Count: 80H x 58W.
19-1340 Coffee Drinker's Confession - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Heartstring Samplery
$10.00 $8.99
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"I don't have a problem with coffee. I have a problem without coffee." MOdel stitched one thread over two on 40 Ct. Wren using Weeks Dye Works, Gentle Art Sampler Threads, and Classic Colorworks (or all DMC 829, 842, 3371 730, 420, 840, 610, 839, 355) Stitch Count: 150W x 70H. Design Size: 8" x 4"
LK154 Wouldn't Life Be Great - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$9.00 $8.09
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"Wouldn't life be great if sweatpants were sexy, Mondays were fun, junk food was good for you, girls didn't cause so much drama, guys weren't so confusing, and saying goodbye only meant until tomorrow". Model stitched on 32 count Lambswool linen with Crescent Colours thread, Weeks Dye Works thread, and DMC floss (or all DMC 3031, 3687, 3807, 3828, 3790, 731, 3813). Stitch count is 221W x 72H.
LK-S99 Wine a Bit - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$5.00 $4.49
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"Wine a bit... you'll feel better!" Model stitched on 30 count Natural Northern Cross Linen with Weeks Dye Works, Crescent Colours, And Gentle Arts Sampler Threads. Stitch count: 32W x 62H.
08-1774 Housework Never Killed Anyone - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$6.00 $5.39
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Model stitched on 32ct. lambswool linen using Weeks Dye Works and Gentle Arts Sampler Threads. Stitch count: 109w x 45h. (DMC alternates are 3740 745 3052 937 3802 223)
MBT-018 Eat the Chocolate - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
$8.00
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"4 out of 5 voices in my head say...eat the chocolate!" Variations included for "eat the cupcake", "eat the cookie", and "eat the snack." Model stitched on 28 Ct. Ice Blue Lugana with Gentle Art Sampler Threads. Stitch Count: 69W x 67H.
21-1506 Summer Senility - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Sister Lou Stitches
$12.00 Sale $9.59
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"I have lost my mind and am NOT looking for it!!" Model stitched two over one on 16 Ct. Meadow View from Fabric Flair using DMC floss. Stitch Count: 110W x 138H. Design Size: 6.87" 8.62".
20-1295 You're Okay - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Bendy Stitchy Designs
$8.00 $7.19
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"You're okay - I guess" Model stitched on 18 count River Rock Aida with Classic Colorworks, Gentle Art and Weeks Dye Works thread. Stitch count: 91 x 90.
LK-31B Well Behaved Women - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$10.00 $8.99
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"Well behaved women rarely make history!" Model stitched over 2 threads on 27/28 Ct. Cream linen (or similar) with Gentle Art Sampler threads, Weeks Dye Works floss and DMC (or all DMC floss 744, 3811, 3705, 829, 3848, 731, 3348). Stitch count: 44W x 101H. Comes with a button.
17-2168 Christmas Pounds - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Waxing Moon Designs
$7.00 $6.29
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"When, what to my wondering eyes did appear but ten extra pounds on my thighs and my rear." Model stitched over 2 on 28 Ct. Country French Latte using Gentle Art threads. (DMC alternates are 726 912 3832 902 3776 3716 353 938 422 612 3815 321 white) Stitch Count: 96W x 145H. Design Size: 7" x 11"
LK-S103 Do What Your Wife Said - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$5.00 $4.49
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"If at first you don't succeed do what your wife said!" Model stitched on 32 count Lambswool linen with Weeks Dye Works thread, and Gentle Arts Sampler Threads. Stitch count is 127W x 33H.
04-1602 Wine a Bit - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Sue Hillis
$6.00 $5.39
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Don't be shy - "Wine a bit, You'll feel Better!" Includes wine bottle charm. Finished design size is 5 1/4" x 3 3/4" when stitched on 14 Count fabric.
06-2675 Is It Too Late? - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$6.00 $5.39
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A message to Santa: "Is it too late to be good?" Model stitched on 28 Ct. Cappuccino Country French Linen with Weeks Dye Works. Stitch Count: 39W x 81H. (DMC alternates are 3852 815 434 500 367 712 310)
08-1756 Pirate's Creed - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Sue Hillis
$6.00 $5.39
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"The beatings will continue until morale improves." Model was stitched on Summer Khaki Lugana, 28 ct. Uses DMC floss. When stitched on 14/28 count fabric, this design fits nicely into a standard 5" x 7" frame. Includes silver pirate charm.
MBT-265 Sarcasm is My Love Language - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
$8.00
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Model stitched over 2 threads on 32 Ct. Queen Anne's Lace Jobelan with Classic Colorworks floss. Stitch Count: 67W x 67H. Finished size: 4" x 4".
20-3020 If You Fall - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Keslyn's
$14.50 $13.05
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"You & I are sisters. If you fall, I will always be there to pick you up - after I stop laughing!" Model stitched one over two on 28 Ct. Vintage Cashel using French Blue Dark Silk N Colors. Stitch Count: 216H x 119W. Design Size: 15.42" x 8.50"
MBT-260 In My Defense - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
$8.00
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"In my defense I was left unsupervised." Model stitched two over two on 32 Ct. Antique White Jobelan using Weeks Dye Works (or DMC floss 320, 3746, 645, 3804, 3766, 7250. Stitch Count: 85W x 53H. Design Size: 5 1/4" x 3 1/4"
20-1283 Alice's Mad Plant - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Bendy Stitchy Designs
$8.00 $7.19
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Model stitched over two on 28 Ct. Wheat Lugana using DMC floss. Stitch Count: 77W x 72H. Design Size: 5.5" x 5.15"
19-2702 When I am Old - Guardian Angel - Cross Stitch Pattern
by MarNic Designs
$6.00 $5.39
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"I'm on my third guardian angel. The first two quit and are in therapy!" Model stitched two over two on 28 Ct. Antique White Jobelan using DMC floss and Rainbow Gallery Petite Treasure Braid. Also required, but not listed above Kreinik #4 Braid #5730 & 9594 Stitch Count: 124W x 71H. Design Size: 9" x 5"
LK-32B All You Need Is Love - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$10.00 $8.99
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"All you need is love and chocolate!!" Model stitched over 2 threads on 27/28 Ct. Cream linen (or similar) with Gentle Art Sampler threads, Weeks Dye Works floss and DMC (or all DMC floss 744, 3811, 3705, 829, 3848, 731, 3348). Stitch count: 45 x 101H.
20-1019 When I am Old - I Will Sing in the Rain
by MarNic Designs
$6.00 $5.39
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"When I am old, I will sing in the rain!" Model stitched two over two on 28 Ct. Antique White Jobelan using DMC floss, Kreinik #4 Braid and Mill Hill Beads. Specialty Stitch Used: French Knots. Stitch Count: 68W x 98H. Design Size: 4 3/4" x 7"
MBT-236 Marriage - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
$8.00
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"Marriage lets you annoy one special person every day for the rest of your life." Model stitched over 2 threads on 28 Ct. Queen Anne's Lace Jobelan with Weeks Dye Works floss. Stitch Count: 99W x 99H.
19-1151 Self Medicated - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Amy Bruecken Designs
$10.00 $8.99
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"I don't self-medicate with cross stitch. I have a prescriptions. The sales girl called it a receipt." Framed model stitched on 30 Ct. Tin Roof and pillow model stitched on 20 Ct. Guacamole using Classic Colorworks (or all DMC floss 902, 603, 151 319, 156, 333, 729, 676, 470, 472). Stitch Count for Framed: 180W x 74H, Design Size: 12" x 5" For Pillow: 62W x 41H, 4" x 3"
19-1655 Stitch a Day - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Amy Bruecken Designs
$10.00 $8.99
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"A stitch a day keeps the crazy away." Large pillow model stitched on 28 Ct. Pink from Fabric Flair, Small pillow stitched on 35 Ct. Sophia's Pink and Framed model stitched on 28 Ct. Kermit using DMC floss. Stitch count is 88W x 50H.
19-1152 Cross Stitch Party - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Amy Bruecken Designs
$10.00 Sale $7.99
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"I like to party - and by party I mean Cross Stitch" Model stitched on 30 Ct. "Linen" linen using DMC floss. Stitch Count for Frame: 102W x 65H, Design Size: 7" x 5" For Pillow: 50W x 34H, 4" x 3"
17-2219 Early Bird - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Amy Bruecken Designs
$9.00 $8.09
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"The early bird can have the worm 'cause worms are gross and mornings are stupid!" Framed model stitched over two threads on 28 Ct. Moonglow by Picture this Plus, using DMC floss & Classic Colorworks floss. Stitch count 70x121. Pillow model stitched on 20 Ct. Banana Popsicle linen by Weeks Dye Works, using DMC Pearl #5 or Dinky Dye's Jumbuck. Stitch count 67x30. Pillow also uses a button pack from Just Another Button Company. (DMC LISTED FOR FRAMED PATTERN ONLY)
17-2215 Adultish - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Amy Bruecken Designs
$9.00 $8.09
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"Just another day of not being RICH and FAMOUS" "Adult-ish" "Kinda care, kinda don't." All models were stitched on 30 Ct. Linen color of your choice, using DMC floss. Stitch count for Rich & Famous: 63 x 80, Design Size: 5" x 6" For ADULT-ish: 75 x 30, 5" x 2" For Kinda Care: 51 x 31, 4" x 3"
17-1241 Not My Monkeys - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Imaginating
$6.00 $5.39
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"Not my circus, not my monkeys." Model stitched on 14 Ct. White Aida with DMC floss. Stitch Count: 174x130. Designed by Ursula Michael.
MBT-198 More Than Coffee - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
$10.00
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"I love you more than coffee, just not always before coffee." Model stitched over 2 threads on 28 Ct. Country French Latte linen with Weeks Dye Works floss. Stitch Count: 126W x 98H.
10-1046 Aged Wine - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Bobbie G Designs
$6.00 $5.39
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"Wine gets better with age. The older I get the better I like it."
Model stitched on 14 count white cloth using DMC.
Stitch count: 44W x 140H.Design Size: 4" x 10"
14-1058 My Funny Valentine - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Heartstring Samplery
$10.00 $8.99
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"My funny Valentine, sweet comic Valentine, you make me smile with my heart. Stay little Valentine stay." Model stitched on 36 Ct. Sand Linen by Picture This Plus with Gentle Art Sampler threads.
Stitch Count: 125x333. Design Size: 7" x 19"
06-3129 Retirement - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Designs By Lisa
$6.50 $5.85
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"Retirement - Feel the Joy!" was stitched on 28 Ct. Sky Blue Linen with Gentle Art Sampler Threads. Stitch Count: 63W x 72H. Design Size: 5" x 6"
"Can't Make Me, I'm Retired" was stitched on 28 Ct. Lambswool linen with Gentle Art Sampler Threads. Stitch Count: 85x65. Design Size: 7" x 5"
(DMC alternates are 3045 977 445 3363 792 791 3802 3371 310)
08-2350 Don't Get Your Tinsel In A Tangle - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$6.00 $5.39
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Model stitched on 28 count Mushroom Lugana with Weeks Dye Works and Gentle Arts Sampler Threads. The stitch count is 70W x 70H.
MBT-027 Lost It! - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
$8.00
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"I think I've lost my mind - maybe it's with my car keys!!!" Model stitched on 28 count Cream Lugana with Weeks Dye Works and Just Another Button Company. Stitch Count: 55W x 61H.
13-2701 How Do You Take Your Coffee - Cross Stitch Pattern
by MarNic Designs
$5.00 $4.49
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"How do you take your coffee? Seriously, very seriously." Stitch Count: 100W x66H. Model stitched on 32 ct Antique white Jobelan using Gentle Art Simply wool, Caron Waterlilies & DMC.
MBT-11 Dog Hair - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
Sale $6.39
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"Dog Hair....just another specialty fiber!" Model stitched on 28 Ct. Mushroom Lugana with Weeks Dye Works and DMC. Stitch Count: 77W x 59H. Buttons from Just Another Button Company sold separately.
06-1533 Country Wise - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Prairie Schooler
$8.00 Sale $6.39
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Models stitched over two threads on 32 count linen using DMC thread. Stitch count: "Plan Ahead" - 157W x 38H; "Keep it Simple" - 160W x 38H; "Measure Twice" - 113W x 70H; "The Witch is In" - 59W x 41H. Book #130
01-2714 Welcome to the Nuthouse - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Waxing Moon Designs
$8.00 $7.19
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A cute little squirrel welcomes you to "the Nuthouse!" Model was stitched on 28 Ct. Riviera Country French Linen from Wichelt using Gentle Art Sampler threads (DMC alternates available). Stitch Count: 71H x 91W. Design Size: 6" x 7"
06-1149 Snowman Kit - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Sue Hillis
$7.00 Sale $5.59
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What do you need to build a snowman? A warm hat, scarf, and mittens, a carrot nose, pipe, coal....oh and of course, plenty of snow! Model stitched on 28 Ct. Ice Blue Lugana. Stitch Count: 94W x 121H. Includes snowflake charm.
MBT121 Normal Family - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
$8.00
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"Remember, as far as anyone knows we are a nice normal family". Model stitched on 32 count Antique White Jobelan with Crescent Colours thread. Stitch count is 134W x 86H.
06-3143 Iced Tea - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Midnight Stitching
$7.00 $6.29
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Model stitched on 28ct jazz cashel using DMC, Gentle Arts, Weeks Dye Works & Kreinik #4 braid. Stitch count 82x73.
18-1834 Size Will Not Matter - Cross Stitch Pattern
by MarNic Designs
$5.00 $4.49
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"When I am old... size will not matter!" Model stitched over two threads on 28 Ct. Antique White Jobelan using DMC floss, Gentle Art Sampler threads and Rainbow Gallery Petite Treasure braids. Stitch count 84w x 47h
19-2597 When I am Old - I Will Rock Girl's Night Out
by MarNic Designs
$6.00 $5.39
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Model stitched over two on 28 Ct. Antique White Jobelan using Caron Waterlilies, Gentle Art Sampler Threads, DMC floss, Kreinik #8 Braid and Mill Hill Beads. Specialty Stitch: French Knot. Also required not listed above Rainbow Gallery Petite Sparkle Rays #PS42 and Caron Collection Rachelette #A89. Stitch Count: 82W x 72h. Design Size: 5.75" x 5.25"
08-2099 Retirement Crazy - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$10.00 $8.99
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"Retirement is a Full Time Job" is stitched on 28 count Country French Latte Linen with a stitch count of 54W x 72H. "Welcome to the Rest of Your Life" is stitched on 28 count Sand Quaker with a stitch count of 80W x 68H. "World's Longest Coffee Break" is stitched on 32 count Lambswool Linen with a stitch count of 69W x 68H. Models use Gentle Arts Sampler Threads and Weeks Dye Works. (DMC alternates are 931 729 347 3823 3362 930)
MBT-245 Dog Crazy - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
$8.00
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"Just one dog short of crazy" Model stitched over 2 threads on 28 Ct. Lambswool Jobelan with Weeks Dye Works floss (or DMC floss 165, 640, 838, 535, 312, 815, 3345, 3045). Stitch Count: 71W x 71H. Design Size: 5" x 5"


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