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Funny Cross Stitch Patterns

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96 items found

21-1506 Summer Senility - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Sister Lou Stitches
$12.00 $10.79
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"I have lost my mind and am NOT looking for it!!"
19-1340 Coffee Drinker's Confession - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Heartstring Samplery
$10.00 $8.99
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"I don't have a problem with coffee. I have a problem without coffee." MOdel stitched one thread over two on 40 Ct. Wren using Weeks Dye Works, Gentle Art Sampler Threads, and Classic Colorworks (or all DMC 829, 842, 3371 730, 420, 840, 610, 839, 355) Stitch Count: 150W x 70H. Design Size: 8" x 4"
18-1425 Frogs in Your Underpants - Cross Stitch Pattern
by The Nebby Needle
$12.00 $10.79
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"May the light always find you on a dreary day. When you need a home may you find your way. May you always have courage to take a chance - and never find frogs in your underpants." Model stitched over 2 threads on 36 Ct. Vintage Lentil with Weeks Dye Works floss and Gentle Art Sampler threads. Stitch Count: 166W x 165H. Design Size: 9" x 9".
18-1937 Loads Of Fun (Laundry Company 2) - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Hands On Design
$9.00 $8.09
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(2nd in the series) Model stitched over two threads on 32 Ct. White Belfast linen using DMC floss. (includes bonus pattern) Stitch count for Loads of fun: 63x91. Design Size: 4" x 6" Stitch count for Bonus Chart: 200x22. Design Size: 13" x 2" Collect all 3 charts in The Laundry Company mini-series to complete the bonus chart (if stitching entire series only 1 skein of each floss is needed with exception of 3849) FABRIC LISTED FOR ONLY THE SMALL PATTERN
08-2099 Retirement Crazy - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$10.00 $8.99
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"Retirement is a Full Time Job" is stitched on 28 count Country French Latte Linen with a stitch count of 54W x 72H. "Welcome to the Rest of Your Life" is stitched on 28 count Sand Quaker with a stitch count of 80W x 68H. "World's Longest Coffee Break" is stitched on 32 count Lambswool Linen with a stitch count of 69W x 68H. Models use Gentle Arts Sampler Threads and Weeks Dye Works. (DMC alternates are 931 729 347 3823 3362 930)
21-1358 Younger - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Imaginating
$7.00 $6.29
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"I've decided what I want to be when I get older...younger." Model stitched two over two on 14 Ct. White Aida using DMC floss. Stitch Count: 100x43. Design Size: 7" x 10".
20-1283 Alice's Mad Plant - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Bendy Stitchy Designs
$8.00 $7.19
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Model stitched over two on 28 Ct. Wheat Lugana using DMC floss. Stitch Count: 77W x 72H. Design Size: 5.5" x 5.15"
17-2219 Early Bird - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Amy Bruecken Designs
$9.00 $8.09
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"The early bird can have the worm 'cause worms are gross and mornings are stupid!" Framed model stitched over two threads on 28 Ct. Moonglow by Picture this Plus, using DMC floss & Classic Colorworks floss. Stitch count 70x121. Pillow model stitched on 20 Ct. Banana Popsicle linen by Weeks Dye Works, using DMC Pearl #5 or Dinky Dye's Jumbuck. Stitch count 67x30. Pillow also uses a button pack from Just Another Button Company. (DMC LISTED FOR FRAMED PATTERN ONLY)
LK154 Wouldn't Life Be Great - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$9.00 $8.09
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"Wouldn't life be great if sweatpants were sexy, Mondays were fun, junk food was good for you, girls didn't cause so much drama, guys weren't so confusing, and saying goodbye only meant until tomorrow". Model stitched on 32 count Lambswool linen with Crescent Colours thread, Weeks Dye Works thread, and DMC floss (or all DMC 3031, 3687, 3807, 3828, 3790, 731, 3813). Stitch count is 221W x 72H.
LK-S103 Do What Your Wife Said - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$5.00 $4.49
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"If at first you don't succeed do what your wife said!" Model stitched on 32 count Lambswool linen with Weeks Dye Works thread, and Gentle Arts Sampler Threads. Stitch count is 127W x 33H.
08-2638 Wear A Smile - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$5.00 $4.49
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Model stitched on 32 Ct. Hand Dyed African Daisy Jobelan with Weeks Dye Works. DMC equivalents are 798 3777 3347. Stitch Count: 58W x 50H. Blue Flower Button sold separately.
MBT-265 Sarcasm is My Love Language - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
$8.00
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Model stitched over 2 threads on 32 Ct. Queen Anne's Lace Jobelan with Classic Colorworks floss. Stitch Count: 67W x 67H. Finished size: 4" x 4".
MBT-260 In My Defense - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
$8.00
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"In my defense I was left unsupervised." Model stitched two over two on 32 Ct. Antique White Jobelan using Weeks Dye Works (or DMC floss 320, 3746, 645, 3804, 3766, 7250. Stitch Count: 85W x 53H. Design Size: 5 1/4" x 3 1/4"
20-1874 My Stitching Time - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Waxing Moon Designs
$6.00 $5.39
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"My stitching time is sometimes for your sanity, remember that." Model stitched over two on 32 Ct. Azure Blue Lugana using Weeks Dye Works (or DMC floss white, 369, 938, 902, 471, 3819, 3716, 223). Stitch Count: 83W x 84H. Design Size: 5 1/8" x 5 1/4"
20-1794 Let Me Be At peace With My Universe - Cross Stitch Pattern
by MarNic Designs
$5.00 $4.49
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Model stitched over two on 28 Ct. Antique White Jobelan using DMC floss, Kreinik #4 Braid and Rainbow Gallery. Also required, but not listed above Wisper W93 from Rainbow Gallery. Stitch Count: 65W x 92H. Design Size: 4.5" x 6.5"
20-1295 You're Okay - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Bendy Stitchy Designs
$8.00 $7.19
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"You're okay - I guess" Model stitched on 18 count River Rock Aida with Classic Colorworks, Gentle Art and Weeks Dye Works thread. Stitch count: 91 x 90.
20-1019 When I Am Old I Will Sing in the Rain - Cross Stitch Pattern
by MarNic Designs
$6.00 $5.39
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"When I am old, I will sing in the rain!" Model stitched two over two on 28 Ct. Antique White Jobelan using DMC floss, Kreinik #4 Braid and Mill Hill Beads. Specialty Stitch Used: French Knots. Stitch Count: 68W x 98H. Design Size: 4 3/4" x 7"
19-1151 Self Medicated - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Amy Bruecken Designs
$10.00 $8.99
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"I don't self-medicate with cross stitch. I have a prescriptions. The sales girl called it a receipt." Framed model stitched on 30 Ct. Tin Roof and pillow model stitched on 20 Ct. Guacamole using Classic Colorworks (or all DMC floss 902, 603, 151 319, 156, 333, 729, 676, 470, 472). Stitch Count for Framed: 180W x 74H, Design Size: 12" x 5" For Pillow: 62W x 41H, 4" x 3"
MBT-198 More Than Coffee - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
$10.00
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"I love you more than coffee, just not always before coffee." Model stitched over 2 threads on 28 Ct. Country French Latte linen with Weeks Dye Works floss. Stitch Count: 126W x 98H.
MBT-177 Our Family Tree - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
$8.00
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"Our family tree has deep roots and lots of nuts." Model was stitched on 32 Ct. Lambswool Jobelan from Wichelt using Weeks Dye Works threads. Stitch count: 85W x 53H.
15-2227 Water Essential - Cross Stitch Pattern
by MarNic Designs
$5.99 $5.39
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"Water is the most essential element of life, without it u can't make coffee." Model stitched on 28 Ct. Beige Jobelan with Caron Collection Waterlilies and DMC floss. Stitch Count: 121W x 103H
PS176 Ten Extra Pounds - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Sue Hillis
$6.00 $5.39
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"When what to my wondering eyes should appear, but 10 extra pounds on hips, thighs, and rear." Model stitched on 14 Ct. or 28 Ct. fabric of your choice with Sullivan's or DMC. Stitch Count: 57x80.
14-1058 My Funny Valentine - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Heartstring Samplery
$10.00 $8.99
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"My funny Valentine, sweet comic Valentine, you make me smile with my heart. Stay little Valentine stay." Model stitched on 36 Ct. Sand Linen by Picture This Plus with Gentle Art Sampler threads.
Stitch Count: 125x333. Design Size: 7" x 19"
PS164 Drive a Stick - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Sue Hillis
$6.00 $5.39
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"Yes, I can drive a stick." Model stitched on 30 Ct. Lilac linen by Weeks Dye Works with Sullivan's floss. Stitch Count: 80H x 58W.
MBT-018 Eat the Chocolate - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
$8.00
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"4 out of 5 voices in my head say...eat the chocolate!" Variations included for "eat the cupcake", "eat the cookie", and "eat the snack." Model stitched on 28 Ct. Ice Blue Lugana with Gentle Art Sampler Threads. Stitch Count: 69W x 67H.
08-1774 Housework Never Killed Anyone - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$6.00 $5.39
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Model stitched on 32ct. lambswool linen using Weeks Dye Works and Gentle Arts Sampler Threads. Stitch count: 109w x 45h. (DMC alternates are 3740 745 3052 937 3802 223)
08-1756 Pirate's Creed - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Sue Hillis
$6.00 $5.39
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"The beatings will continue until morale improves." Model was stitched on Summer Khaki Lugana, 28 ct. Uses DMC floss. When stitched on 14/28 count fabric, this design fits nicely into a standard 5" x 7" frame. Includes silver pirate charm.
08-2551 Hen Party - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Little House Needleworks
$6.00 $5.39
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Model stitched on 28ct. Creme Brulee using DMC & Crescent Colours. Uses Mill Hill Glass Seed Beads and a Tiny Tuscan Sun Swirly Bud by Just Another Button Company. Stitch count: 82 x 54.
20-3020 If You Fall - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Keslyn's
$14.50 $13.05
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"You & I are sisters. If you fall, I will always be there to pick you up - after I stop laughing!" Model stitched one over two on 28 Ct. Vintage Cashel using French Blue Dark Silk N Colors. Stitch Count: 216H x 119W. Design Size: 15.42" x 8.50"
20-2695 Bad Decisions - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Kays Frames and Designs
$10.00 Sale $7.99
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"Bad decisions make great stories" Model stitched over two on 32 Ct. Lambswool Jobelan using Weeks Dye Works and Classic Colorworks (or DMC floss 3371 3362 316). Stitch Count: 188x48. Design Size: 12" x 3"
20-1881 Personal Is Political - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Bendy Stitchy Designs
$8.00 $7.19
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"The personal is political it always has been" Model stitched over two 32 Ct. Blush lien using DMC floss. Stitch count: 75w x 85h. Design Size: 5" x 5"
MBT-245 Dog Crazy - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
$8.00
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"Just one dog short of crazy" Model stitched over 2 threads on 28 Ct. Lambswool Jobelan with Weeks Dye Works floss (or DMC floss 165, 640, 838, 535, 312, 815, 3345, 3045). Stitch Count: 71W x 71H. Design Size: 5" x 5"
19-2841 When I Grow Old I Will Relive My Youth
by MarNic Designs
$6.00 $5.39
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Model stitched two over two on 28 Ct. Antique White Jobelan using DMC floss and Rainbow Gallery Petite Treasure Bread. Stitch Count: 103W x 49H. Design Size: 7 1/2" x 3 1/2"
20-1029 Coffee, Tea or Me?
by MarNic Designs
$5.00 $4.49
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"When I am old, I will ask Coffee, Tea or Me?" Model stitched two over two on 28 Ct. Antique White Jobelan using DMC floss and Caron Waterlilies. Specialty Stitches Used Lazy Daisy Stitch and 1/2 Stitch. Stitch Count: 59W x 58H. Design Size: 4 1/4" x 4 1/4"
19-2036 Choose Your Own Motto Sampler - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Heartstring Samplery
$12.00 $10.79
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"All I'm saying is that you've never seen me crying and eating tacos at the same time." Model stitched one over two on 40 Ct. Cocoa using Weeks Dye Works, Gentle Art Sampler Threads, and Classic Colorworks (or all DMC floss 924, 436, 356, 221, 3364, 680, 3818, Ecru, 939, 3064, 3834, 730, 3778, 3829, 3768, 935). Stitch Count: 205W x 171H. Design Size: 11" x 9"
MBT-224 Nothing to Fear - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
$8.00
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"There's nothing to fear but fear itself..and spiders!" Model stitched over 2 threads on 28 Ct. Queen Anne's Lace Jobelan with Weeks Dye Works floss. Stitch Count: 68W x 68H. Shown with a button from Just Another Button Company
19-1826 Funny Things on Halloween - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Romy's Creations
$12.00 Clearance $7.19
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"On Halloween, funny things are seen" Model stitched on 32 Ct. Country Mocha Belfast linen using DMC floss. Stitch count is 95W x 85H.
19-1152 Cross Stitch Party - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Amy Bruecken Designs
$10.00 $8.99
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"I like to party - and by party I mean Cross Stitch" Model stitched on 30 Ct. "Linen" linen using DMC floss. Stitch Count for Frame: 102W x 65H, Design Size: 7" x 5" For Pillow: 50W x 34H, 4" x 3"
KDS-1541 Patch Patch Patch - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Kooler Design Studio
$9.95
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Are you feeling your age??? After 40 it's Patch, Patch, Patch! A whimsical celebrtion of the joys of reaching "matu-rut-y". Stitch Count 51w X 75h. Finished size on 10-count 5" X 7". Model stitched on 10 Count Cream Tula.
18-1720 Growing Old is Inevitable - Cross Stitch Pattern
by MarNic Designs
$5.00 $4.49
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"Growing old is inevitable. Aging is optional." Stitch Count: 84W x 65H
19-1009 When I am Old I Will Celebrate More - Cross Stitch Pattern
by MarNic Designs
$6.00 $5.39
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Model stitched over 2 threads on 28 Ct. Antique White Jobelan with DMC floss, Mill Hill beads and Kreinik #4 Braid. Stitch Count: 65W x 71H
18-2288 I'm Not Old, I'm 25 plus S&H - Cross Stitch Pattern
by MarNic Designs
$5.00 $4.49
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I"m not old, I'm $25 S&H" Model stitched over two on 28 Ct. Antique White Jobelan using DMC, Caron Waterlilies and Gentle Arts threads. Stitch Count: 86W x 57H
LK-31B Well Behaved Women - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Lizzie Kate
$10.00 $8.99
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"Well behaved women rarely make history!" Model stitched over 2 threads on 27/28 Ct. Cream linen (or similar) with Gentle Art Sampler threads, Weeks Dye Works floss and DMC (or all DMC floss 744, 3811, 3705, 829, 3848, 731, 3348). Stitch count: 44W x 101H. Comes with a button.
17-2168 Christmas Pounds - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Waxing Moon Designs
$7.00 $6.29
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"When, what to my wondering eyes did appear but ten extra pounds on my thighs and my rear." Model stitched over 2 on 28 Ct. Country French Latte using Gentle Art threads. (DMC alternates are 726 912 3832 902 3776 3716 353 938 422 612 3815 321 white) Stitch Count: 96W x 145H. Design Size: 7" x 11"
18-1559 I'm Sorry Did My Eyes Roll Out Loud? - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Amy Bruecken Designs
$9.00 $8.09
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"I'm sorry, did my eyes roll out loud" - Model stitched over 2 threads on 30 Ct. Grasshopper linen. Stitch Count: 77 x 44. Design Size: 6" x 3" "Trust me you can dance love, wine" (with variations for beer, vodka & tequila) - Model stitched over 2 threads on 28 ct. Flapper linen. Stitch Count: 68 x 47. Design Size: 5" x 4" Both models stitched with DMC floss.
MBT-196 Warped Humor - Cross Stitch Pattern
by My Big Toe Designs
Sale $6.39
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"I have a warped sense of humor and I'm not afraid to use it." Model stitched over 2 threads on 32 Ct. Antique White Jobelan with Weeks Dye Works floss. Stitch Count: 95W x 63H.
10-1046 Aged Wine - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Bobbie G Designs
$6.00 $5.39
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"Wine gets better with age. The older I get the better I like it."
Model stitched on 14 count white cloth using DMC.
Stitch count: 44W x 140H.Design Size: 4" x 10"
04-1602 Wine a Bit - Cross Stitch Pattern
by Sue Hillis
$6.00 $5.39
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Don't be shy - "Wine a bit, You'll feel Better!" Includes wine bottle charm. Finished design size is 5 1/4" x 3 3/4" when stitched on 14 Count fabric.


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